But a fantasy is not jointly owned property.
It may be fleeting, strange, contradictory, exciting only in imagination and completely uninteresting in real life. Someone may want to share it — and that can become an intensely intimate experience. Or they may have no desire to share it at all.
Some information directly affects a partner: sexual health, violations of agreements, boundaries, actions involving other people. In those cases, privacy can affect the other person’s ability to make informed decisions.
A thought, a dream, a fantasy or an internal erotic scenario belongs to a different category.
I find it interesting how readily we accept people’s right to private thoughts in almost every area of life — and how quickly we start questioning that right once those thoughts become sexual.
Intimacy can mean “I can tell you a great deal.” It does not necessarily mean “I owe you everything.”