But for many people, it does not work that linearly.
You can be going about your day without thinking about sex at all. Then your partner comes closer, hugs you, kisses you, there is flirting, a pleasant touch, a sense of connection — and only then does the thought appear: “Now I want this to continue.”
That distinction matters because the absence of a spontaneous “I want sex right now” can easily be mistaken for having no libido at all.
Especially when you are with someone whose desire often seems to appear on its own.
Today we will look at why sexual desire is not always the first link in the chain. Sometimes it is one of the things that emerges along the way.